Saving Grace
by donna79
Summary: You can't run from your past. It will eventually find you. A story of love, redemption, and second chances
1. Truth, Bitter Truth

**Story Title: Saving Grace**

**Summary: You can't run from your past. It will eventually find you. A story of love, redemption, and second chances.**

**Pairing Jacob/Bella...eventually.**

**AN: I get story ideas all the time but a lot of them get discarded because I can't make them work. That was not the case with this one.**

If you asked Bella Swan, life was as perfect as perfect could get. She had a fiancee who would do anything for her and loved her so much that he was willing to sacrifice everything to be with her. She considered herself lucky. She and Edward had not had an easy road to get where they were. She had given up a lot to be with him and would be giving up more in the coming months.

She couldn't wait to be Mrs. Edward Cullen. Not only for the obvious reasons but also beccause she wanted her own small piece of forever. Her life wouldn't be complete without him.

The only hitch in her happiness was that she'd hurt her best friend so badly that they had left without saying goodbye. She knew she never should has asked Alice to send Jacob a wedding invitation. She had hammered the final nail in the coffin of their friendship and she wished that she could go back and make things right.

Alice took the reigns when it came to the wedding plans because it wasn't something that Bella wanted. She had wanted a small wedding with only their families present. Edward had given Alice the go ahead to invite her friends from school and the pack.

Bella's reluctance to be a part of the wedding plans had been the first red flag that Edward noticed. The second happened the day that Charlie had brought home the missing posters. Granted Bella had no part in it but Charlie had made it loud and clear whose side he was on. No one would replace Jacob in Charlie's eyes. Bella had taken Edward's side but he knew that the third strike was coming.

Bella came home from work to find Edward's car in the driveway. He met her at the door holding an envelope in his hand. His face was a mask of hurt and betrayal before he turned on his heel to walk into the living room. Bella sat on the couch while he sat in Charlie's recliner.

"Alice couldn't hide it from me any longer. You got in," he said flatly.

He held out the envelope to her and she saw the University of Mary Washington logo. She hadn't liked asking Alice to keep it from him but she hadn't thought she would get in.

"Virginia, Bella? Really?"

"I applied to appease Charlie. He doesn't have a lot of money to pay for college and they have one of the best English departments in the country."

"It's a little late in the year for you to be applying," Edward observed.

"I've been on the wait list since April. Why does it matter? I'm not going," she reasoned.

"It matters because you kept it from me."

"You've kept things from me too. So, you're the only one who can do that?" she asked credulously.

"I think that you should go. We've only sent out the invitations to the people in Washington. It'll be easy to call it off."

"I don't want to call off the wedding!" she protested.

"It's for the best. I'm holding you back from so much," he said regretfully.

"I don't care about what I'll be missing out on. I only care about you. Please don't do this, not again," she pleaded.

"It's already been decided. I leave in the morning. I love you so much, Bella and I know that you love me too but sometimes that isn't enough," he said before standing.

Bella stared dumbly at where Edward had been sitting. She didn't hear Edward leave but she did notice Alice when she came in with Esme. They sat on either side of her with their arms wrapped around her.

"I didn't see what would happen until it was too late. I'm sorry," Alice said in remorse.

"It's not your fault. I never should have asked you to lie for me."

"If it makes you feel better I see you giong to college in Virginia. You'll make a good life for yourself Bella," Alice reassured her.

"Carlisle found you a therapist close to campus. You need a break Bella, you're due for one," Esme reminded her.

"Can I still keep in contact with you all?"

"Of course! We'd love to know how you're doing," Alice agreed.

"You'll be fine, you just need to take time to heal," Esme said before kissing her temple.

With the next four years of her life decided she felt a little better. She was being forced to move on, but she refused to go down the path that she'd gone down the last time. She couldn't put her parents through that again.

XXXX

Edward had been gone for a month and what would have been their wedding day had passed with very little fanfare. Bella would be leaving for college soon. She was spending as much time as possible with her dad, the Cullen's, and her friends from school. Charlie didn't like that she was moving across the country for college but he was in agreement that she needed some distance from not only the Cullen's but Jacob. He had come back but had yet to come and see Bella. Billy had informed her that Jacob needed time and she was willing to give it to him. She just hoped that Billy had given him the letter that she had written him.

If the Cullen's had heard from Edward they hadn't mentioned it to Bella. Rosalie was semi-cordial to her now. She was glad that Bella had been given another chance at life but she didn't like that it had come at such a high price. Bella couldn't please her if she tried so she had stopped trying.

The Cullen's had decided to throw her a going away party but she was reluctant to go. Her dad had talked her into going as long as he went with her. She could think of better ways to spend her last night in Washington. This would be Charlie's first time going to the Cullen's house and he'd had the same reaction she'd had when she'd seen it for the first time.

Alice let them in and pulled Bella who latched onto Charlie with her other hand up to the second floor living room. The mood was subdued since Jasper was working his magic on Rosalie. She sat by herself with her arms folded over her chest. She obviously was not happy about being there.

"Welcome Charlie, it's good to see you. This is my wife Esme, our daughter Rosalie and our boys Emmett and Jasper. You know Alice," Carlisle said cordially.

"It's nice to meet all of you," Charlie said politely.

"Emmett, Jasper, will the two of you help Billy?" Alice asked.

"You invited Billy?" Charlie asked.

"We invited Jacob as well; but Billy informed us that only he would be coming," Esme explained.

Emmett and Jasper carried Billy's chair up the stairwell and into the room. Pleasentries and introductions were exchanged and Billy nodded politely. He wheeled himself in between Bella and Charlie when Alice brought in a cake. Bon Voyage, Bella was written in pink frosting across the white sheet cake. It was served and Charlie and Billy each ate two slices to Bella's one. After Esme's had packed up the leftovers so that Billy could share them with the pack Alice announced that it was time for presents.

"You didn't have to get me anything," Bella admonished.

"What is a going away party without presents?" Alice asked.

A heavy, rectangular box was placed in her lap and Esme announced that it was from her and Carlisle. They had gotten her a new Macbook since hers was outdated.

"Your dad can use yours, that way you two can keep in touch.," Carlisle explained.

"I don't know anything about computers," Charlie dissagreed.

"That's okay Sir, I can help you," Emmett answered.

"Emmett's a genius with computers Dad," Bella agreed.

"I guess it'll be okay then," Charlie relented.

Emmett had given her an Ihome to go with the new Ipod touch that Rosalie had gotten her. Jasper had gotten her a updated version of Webster's Encyclopedic Unabridged Dictionary while Alice had given her a beautiful plaid wool peacoat.

"To keep you warm, it's a lot colder in Virginia than it is here. I hear it snows a lot more too," she explained.

Bella caught on to what she was implying. Alice was informing her of a vision, she was grateful for the warning. Billy handed her a medium sized square box and she found a picture of her, Charlie, Jacob, and himself. It was a fairly recent picture, it looked like it had been taken just before the newborn battle.

"So you don't forget the people that love you," he explained.

"Thanks, Billy, this is really nice," she said, running her fingers over the glass.

"We have a gift from all of us; great minds think alike," Esme said holding out an identical box.

The picture of the Cullen's was recent as well but not so recent that Edward was missing. His topaz eyes smiled back at her making her sigh. She couldn't help but feel guilty since he had left because of her.

"There's one last present. It was supposed to be your wedding present from Edward but he mentioned that he still wanted you to have it," Carlisle explained.

Emmett led the way to the garage and her draw dropped to the floor. In the middle of the garage sat a shiny blue Ford Prius. He had taken her words to heart when she had complained about the tank that she had been forced to drive after Clementine had bitten the dust.

"It runs on a power cord, not gasoline. Whoever heard of such a thing?" Emmett asked with a scoff.

"I love it, it's just what I wanted. Will you thank him for me?" she asked Carlisle.

"Of course," he promised.

Emmett loaded Bella's presents into the car while Jasper and Charlie helped Billy into his truck. Bella dreaded saying goodbye to the people who had treated her like family since she had first met them. It wasn't going to be easy leaving them but they understood that she needed a fresh start.

Esme pulled Bella to her first. She held her tightly and Jasper put a hand on each of the their shoulders. Bella smiled her thanks before moving on to Carlisle. He handed her an envelope which she guessed more than likely held money from the feel of it. He patted her back reassuringly before passing her off to Rosalie who gave her a limp hug. Emmett picked her up off the floor, spinning her around. He gave her a wide grin when he finally set her down.

"Thanks Emmett; I needed my back cracked," she deadpanned.

"Anytime, Bells," he said with a bark of laughter.

Alice pulled her close holding her in a desperate grip.

"Call and write because I can't visit," she said in a small voice.

"I promise," Bella said with a nod.

"Allie, let her go. She's got to be up early and she's got a long day ahead of her tomorrow," Jasper said gently.

Bella found that her car had been pulled out of the garage since she had trouble backing out of tight spaces. The whole family had come into the yard to see her off. She looked into her rearview mirror just before she made the last turn to see Esme, Alice and Carlisle wave one last time. She heaved a heavy sigh, knowing that this would the last time she would ever see them. She didn't know how she knew but she could feel deep in her gut that she had closed the chapter in her life that included them.

XXXX

She and Charlie were on the road by seven the next morning. He'd had trouble finding a way to attatch the car to his truck so that she didn't have to follow him. Sam had been able to lend him a trailor and loaded the car on it for them. By five that afternoon they had been driving nonstop and were in San Antonio. They decided to stay the night there and head out before the sun the next morning. As it was they would pushing it if she would make it to freshman orientation.

There wasn't much to be said since neither of them were good with goodbyes. She knew that he would miss her without his having to say it just like he knew that she would miss him. She needed to try to make a go of it on her own. Even if the idea of being on her own did scare the living daylights out of her.

They made it to the school with an hour to spare. They found her building and dorm room before Charlie told her that he could bring up the stuff on his own. She found the auditorium and found a seat in the back with a few minutes until orientation started. She felt herself relax as the Dean welcomed them and gave a speech about what was expected of them as students. Her life really was begining and she couldn't wait to find out what happened next.

XXXX

Jacob Black was a glutton for punishment. That's what he got for falling in love with someone who loved someone else. Yes, Bella loved him too; she had even admitted it but not enough to choose him over Edward. He hadn't come back for her, despite what everyone thought. He had come back because he was tired of running from his problems. Not only did his dad need him but so did the pack.

He hadn't been surprised when his dad told him that Edward had called off the wedding. He had been surprised to find out that Bella was leaving though. He had hoped that given a little time that he and Bella could make a go of things. He needed time to himself and she had respected that. Now he had missed his chance; because why would she come back to small town life after living away?

His dad had lectured him for three hours the night of her going away party. How could he have been so stupid? All because of his wounded pride. He pulled the letter she had written him out of a copy of The Adventures of Huckelberry Finn that she'd given him for his birthday that year. It was worn from where he had read it over and over in the week since his dad had given it to him.

_Jake,_

_I know that I've made a mess of things and I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me one day. Like you, I need time for myself right now. I'll never forget all of the time that we spent together and just know that I'll never meet anyone as special as you._

_I really made a mess of things didn't I? I can't tell you how sorry I am for everything I've done. I'm sorry for being so stubborn and not telling how I really felt sooner. Maybe if I had things would be different. I don't know if I'll ever see again so this is my telling you goodbye and I hope that one day you meet a girl who is even more important to you than I ever was._

_I love you,_

_Bells_

He shook his head in frustration. He would never meet a girl who measured up to Bella. If he ever imprinted the poor girl would just have to adjust to living with the ghost of Bella always in the picture. Maybe if he hadn't pushed her away they could have worked things out and salvaged their friendship. There wasn't a chance of that now.

**AN2: I want to point out that there really is a University of Mary Washington. Back when I was in high school it was where I wanted to go to college. Due to lack of money and a family situation I put it on the back burner. One day, I will go to college, but right now isn't it. So let me know what you all think because I can't improve on my writing if no one tells me if I'm doing something wrong.**


	2. Never Let Go

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. I also do not own the song It's You. Sadly, they belong to Stephenie Myer and Tony Lucca.**

**AN: Thanks so much for the positive feedback everybody. Y'all are the reason that I love writing so much. You guys are awesome.**

_Six months later_

In the months since she left Washington Bella had learned that she was stronger than she ever thought she could be. Not a day went by that she didn't think about Jacob and how much she missed him. She knew that being away from everyone that she knew and everything that she was comfortable with wouldn't be easy and some days she wanted to throw in the towel but she never went through with it. No matter how much she wanted to she knew that Jacob would never forgive her for giving up on her dreams. Even though they weren't together and it was hard Jacob had wanted nothing more than for her to go after what she wanted. Things got a little bit easier every day.

Severing contact with everyone she knew hadn't been easy at first. After six months she had a small group of friends which included her roommate who had also ran away from someone they cared about. Bella had found a kindred spirit and for that she was grateful. Her classes and the assignments that her professors threw at her left and right kept her busy most of the time. She dreamed of Jacob almost every night. She refused to ask her dad about him and when he tried to fill her in on how he was doing she would quickly change the subject. She didn't want to know how he was doing; if she found out that he was hurting or hadn't been able to pick up the pieces she would be on the first plane back without thinking twice. Keeping her distance from him was for the best, no matter how much it hurt.

"Bella? Hello, earth to Bella?" Her roommate, Stacey questioned, waving her hand in front of Bella's face

"What?" Bella asked, shaking her head to clear it of thoughts of Jacob.

"Class is over, we can leave now," Stacey announced, giving her a worried look.

Bella gave her a sheepish smile before gathering her things. If it weren't Valentine's Day than things wouldn't be so bad. Her mind had drifted back to last year without her wanting it to, it was like it had a mind of it's own. Her heart broke a little knowing that Jacob was more than likely remembering last year as well when things had been simpler and Edward hadn't been in the picture. Stacey had bought her a dozen yellow roses with a hand written card that said '_I feel your pain. We'll get through this together.'_

Bella considered herself lucky to have Stacey in her life. Whenever she felt like wallowing Stacey was there to lend a shoulder or make an ice cream and cookie dough run. Bella had told her everything short of Jacob and his friends being werewolves and the Cullen's being vampires. She hadn't heard a single word from the Cullen's, which she had expected. She'd known that the last time she had seen them would be her last so she had made her goodbye count. That didn't mean that she didn't miss them; she still found herself dialing the first six numbers of Alice's number before forcing herself to stop from time to time.

She was lucky that school kept her busy. She thrived off of having to write paper after paper because it kept her from thinking of what could have been. Her will power was growing stronger by the day.

XXXX

Jacob eyes drifted open slowly, his hand reaching out from beneath the sheet to slap his alarm clock to turn it off. He rolled onto his back with a sigh. Bella had been gone for six months and the wounds in his heart still felt fresh like it had been yesterday. He hadn't expected her to cut all ties with him. Getting through the day without her would be a struggle if it weren't for Embry and Quil. Quil tried to understand what he was going through but it just wasn't possible. He had his imprint while Jacob was left to wonder what could have been. Embry was more accepting and more willing to listen when Jacob wanted to talk but most of the time he kept his feelings inside.

He'd gotten through the last six months the only way he knew how. He kept his feelings buried and put on a brave face; all the while he was coming up with a plan. He didn't care how long it took, he was going to find his way back to Bella and they were going to be together. His need to be with her kept him going most days and he would not give up until he had her. People would probably think he was crazy if they knew what he was up to, that was why he kept his plans to himself.

Not a day went by that he didn't think about her and wish that she was there with him. He was happy that she was going after what she wanted but he had thought that she would be closer to home. Her need for space baffled him. Had she cared about him at all? How could she walk away from what they had without looking back?

"You up, son?" Billy asked through the door.

"I'm awake," Jacob called tiredly.

"But are you up? You've got less than twenty minutes to get to school."

Jacob threw his legs over the side of the bed with a heavy sigh. He made his way through the semi-darkness to his closet. Rachel had moved out at the end of the summer and was now living with Paul in what Billy called 'unwedded bliss', that meant that Jacob got his room back. He dressed quickly and met his dad in the kitchen. Billy had three sausage mcmuffins and a bag of tater tots sitting on the table for Jacob and he grabbed with a thankful nod.

"You got everything ready for that meeting with your guidance counselor after school?"

"Yes Sir," he said in between bites of sandwich and tater tots.

Billy knew bits and pieces of Jacob's plan only because Jacob needed his permission to make part of it a reality. Billy understood what Jacob was doing and he agreed that it would be good for him to put some distance between himself and everything that was going on in his life.

People threw the fact that it was Valentine's Day at Jacob left and right. He'd gotten a text message from Jared asking him to cover his patrol that night so that he could take Kim out and he had agreed without thinking twice. Couples acting like love sick puppies passed him in the halls at school and if one more person wished happy valentine's day he was going to throw up. He sat by the bank of windows outside the guidance office waiting to be let in. Quil and Embry had no clue what he was doing and since he didn't feel like answering the questions that they would throw at them they had been kept out of the loop. He didn't even know if his plan would work.

"Jacob?" His guidance counselor asked from the door to his office.

Jacob stood and the man opened the door wider with a small smile. He sat down and the older man waited until he'd sat down across from him before clearing his throat.

"As you know I've been looking for every scholarship and grant I can find so that your dad won't be stuck paying for you to go to college."

Mr. Turner was fresh out of college and had only been working for the school for two years. He was related to Sam somehow and had always been kind to the pack at Sam's request. He shuffled some papers on his desk before finding a folder near the bottom of a stack of envelopes. He opened the folder and spread the papers inside across the already cluttered desk.

"I've found several scholarships that are still open and two grants that you can apply for. Before I give these to you, I want to ask you something. Have you ever given any thought to joining the Military? Even if you enlisted for four years they would pay for your schooling."

"The Military isn't for me. I've heard stories from my dad and granddad about serving and I couldn't do that to my family," he said with a shake of his head.

"That's fine, I understand. Now we know that you've been accepted into UW we can move forward with getting these forms filled out. Congratulations Jacob on making the decision to further your education," he said with a smile.

Jacob took the folder from him at the end of their hour and was one step closer to having his plan become a reality. He knew that he was making the right decision.

XXXX

Bella walked into her room to find Stacey hunched over her desk reading an e-mail. From her sagging shoulders and the sad look and the fact that she was worrying her bottom lip the e-mail was from her ex-boyfriend, Elijah. Stacey had broken up with him just before starting college because she didn't think that they could withstand a long distance relationship. Elijah would e-mail her at least once a week, depending on how much he missed her. Bella was glad that she hadn't been put in her situation. She wouldn't be able to stand it if Jacob had kept in contact with her.

Stacey raked a hand over her face before shutting down her computer. She turned in her seat to look at Bella, the look on her face let Bella know that she needed her support.

"What's happened?"

"The usual, he still loves me, he needs me, he can't live without me," she said sadly.

"There's only an hour and half's distance between the two of you, right?"

"Mmhmm."

"Why not give him a chance?"

"Are you willing to listen to your own advice?"

"I never dated Jacob and he's also two thousand miles away," Bella rationalized.

"Why did you decide to go to school so far away?"

This wasn't the first time that Stacey had asked Bella that question. Every time she had darted around the question. Evade and deny had been her defense tactact until now. Could she tell her the reason without giving away Jacob's secret? 

"Jacob has a lot of responsibilites to his tribe and I was standing in the way. I thought it would be best if I put some distance between us."

"When you say that he has responsibilities do you mean that he could one day become chief of the tribe?"

"Yeah, his dad is chief now so logically Jacob is next in line."

"So he has to marry within the tribe?"

"Something like that," Bella said with a slow nod.

"I guess I can see where your coming from. Why put your heart on the line if there isn't any hope of being with him?"

Stacey had hit the nail on the target without even knowing the whole story. Part of the reason why Bella had left was to give Jacob the chance to get over her and in time imprint on someone else. She couldn't be around him knowing that he was with someone else, she wasn't as strong as he was.

"Would you be okay with me being a lovesick fool while you're hurting?" Stacey asked in concern.

"Why should would we both be miserable? You have a chance at something wonderful and you would be foolish not to take it. Call Elijah, I'll give you some privacy."

"No, I'll leave. Thanks Bella," Stacey said, hugging her fiercly.

Stacey left and Bella sat at her desk and waited for her laptop to boot up. She prayed with everything she had that Jacob wouldn't choose today of all days to get in touch with her. She hadn't changed her contact information so it wouldn't be hard for him to drop her an e-mail or even leave her a voice mail. The only thing she had done was unfriend him on Facebook which had been hard enough. She sighed in relief after browsing through her inbox. Jacob hadn't e-mailed her but her parents had. She sent her mom a short message wishing her a happy valentine's day. The e-mail from her dad was like all of the others he had sent her, he tried to reason her into calling Jacob or at least e-mailing her. He never mentioned how Jacob was doing just that he felt that she was making the wrong decision by ignoring him. She sent him a short e-mail, dancing around what he wanted to talk about.

She shut down her internet and got to work on a paper that wasn't due for almost a week; anything to keep her mind of what Jacob might be doing right at that moment.

XXXX

Embry and Quil were waiting for Jacob when he got home the next morning from running patrol. He'd had a stress, drama, romance free night and now the two of them were hell bent on bringing him down, he just knew it. Quil sat on the steps with his elbows resting on his knees while Embry leaned against the ramp leading to the front door.

"Whatever you two have to say I don't want to hear it. I'm going to bed," Jacob said before either of them could confront him.

"When were you planning on telling us that you were going to college?" Embry asked.

"How did you two find out?" he asked with shocked, confused eyes.

"You don't know that they post a list of every one who's been accepted into college in the office? Imagine my suprise when I found your name on the list when I got sent to the Principal's office yesterday," Quil accused.

"Do I even want to know why you were sent to see Principal Harper?"

"That's not important. Why would you keep this from us?" Embry asked, hurt.

"It's a decision that I made at the start of the school year. I found out a few weeks ago."

"So you've had no time for us because you've been busting your ass trying to get into college?" Quil asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"No, I've been busting my ass trying to keep my grades where they need to be. My dad had to hire a tutor," Jacob explained.

"That doesn't explain why you want to go to college?"

"Don't the two of you want to get away from here? Don't you ever want something more?"

"You'd really ditch us, abandon the pack?" Embry asked, confused.

"I'm not ditching or abandoning anyone. Jared's juggling college and the pack just fine and he's willing to help me."

"Jared knows?" Quil asked quickly.

"He's been tutoring me ever since school started. I'm even going to the same school as him so he can help me in college."

"Why is going to college so important to you? You've never wanted to go before now," Embry rationalized.

"Things change."

"Is this about Bells? You don't have some half-cocked plan to make her see that the two of you can be together, do you?" Quil asked.

"No," Jacob scoffed.

"Liar," Quil said, calling him out.

"She isn't coming back Jake," Embry said gently.

"I know she's not, but that doesn't mean that I can't go to her," Jacob said before walking up the ramp to go inside.

Once inside the house Jacob threw his bag on the floor in his bedroom. He shouldn't have told Embry and Quil so much but they had pushed him too far. He didn't have to answer to them. He also didn't expect them to see where he was coming from. Neither of them had ever lost someone who was important to them but he had; not once, but twice now. He wasn't going to give up easily.

He switched on his iPod doc before laying down on his bed. The music was just background noise while he tried to calm his thoughts. Someone had messed with his radio station again and put it on a light music station but he didn't care, the music was soothing enough not to agitate his nerves. A song started that caught his attention. He'd never heard it before and at first he didn't understand why this one song over all of the others had gotten his attention.

_I shared with her all my thoughts on lonliness_

_Shared with her all my fears of afraid_

_Baby, there's no point trying to paint a picture_

_Of what if she would have stayed_

The words hit his heart like bullets and embedded themselves there. It was like the artists had taken an intimate look into his life and written a song about it. No song had ever affected him like this. The song continued and by the time it was over Jacob had found it on the internet. He downloaded it then played it again. He was near tears by the time the bridge came in.

_So don't send me no letter_

_I won't drop you no line_

_Things will get better_

_Baby in due time_

_Just keep my in your prayers_

_And I'll keep you right here deep in this heart of mine_

_'Cause I've found_

_The only thing that helps me make it through is you_

_It's you_

He now had a new resolve and he was more determined than ever to find a way to get back to Bella.

**AN2: Okay, so even I think my Jacob muse is a little scary when he's broken hearted and left to his own devices. But now you know part of the plan that he's come up with. Will it work? You'll have to wait and see.**


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